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N: It is a truth often forgotten that The End is very rarely the end. Tyrants may fall and galaxies may burn and life goes on. But, as Alice is about to discover, sometimes there are places fall that through the cracks.
A: “Come in, Comsat Cheshire, please respond. This is Scout Captain Alice Liddel
requesting confirmation, over.”
CC: “Hello! Fantastic to meet you, Alice! What can I do for you?”
A: “I’m picking up the signal of an old RABIT beacon circling your planet.”
CC: “Correct. I have refused it landing and broadcast permissions as its contents have been deemed detrimental to the war effort”
A: “What? But it’s the ceasefire declaration. The war is over.”
CC: “Which I’m sure you’ll agree is very detrimental to King Cole’s war effort!”
A: “It’s been sixty years! Who’s in charge of your protocols?”
CC: “All sufficiently ranking Crown officers are dead.”
A: “Override code 473-GR1N...”
CC: “Code refused. You have been deemed detrimental to the war effort. Needle drones DE and DM have been dispatched to assist you. Have a great day!”

N: Now it would take a lot more than being shot down to put an end to someone like Alice. Climbing from the wreckage, she saw something she had only read about in storybooks: a rebel encampment. Screams and gunfire drifted faintly on the breeze as she moved down the hill, past the corpses in hand-me-down uniforms, and into the base, where a young general stared at her with hazy, unfocused eyes.
A: Are you in command here?
I’ve been forced to land near your base.
C: Well then relax, don’t be so tense...
A: The war that was raging
is now only waged in this place.
C: I’m sorry, you’re not making sense.
A: Since the drones brought me down
Both the rebels and crown tried to shoot me.
C: Of course they did, that’s what they’re for.
A: Whoever is leading you
Needs to be freed of that duty.
C: I’m general, like my father before.
C: “War is all there is, Rookie. Killing and dying. You want to escape? Just take a hit of this.”
[INSTRUMENTAL]
C: This world is a wonderland
Once you can understand death
A: There must be someone here still sane
C: Drink from this tincture
And think about your final breath
A: Not broken by the death and pain
C: Drink me and Eat me
Are orders so sweetly obeyed
A: Are there Crown bases still in range?
C: Just open your mind
To the colours you’ll find if you stay.
A: The air in here makes me feel strange...
C: “You want to find the Red Queen, just head north a day. But if you want to leave, you’ll
have to drink this...”
A: “Fine”
C: “Now take a deep breath open your eyes...”

N: When Alice finally came back to herself, she was absolutely covered in blood. Luckily, none of it was hers, and she shook her head, trying to get rid of the feeling that she was forty feet tall. Nearby, she saw soldiers in all manner and colours of uniform, but to her surprise, instead of gunfire, Alice heard the clink of teacups.
Spoken
Alice: what's going on? Shouldn't you be fighting?
Hatter: we are fighting. There's just a ceasefire.
Alice: Who are you fighting?
Hatter: oh, come on, I'll introduce you.
Hare: Hello!
Verse 1
We fight for our lieges with loyalty unmatched,
That's not changed (we're consistent they say)
We shan't be deserters turn our backs on what we know,
That's insane (it's entirely deranged)
Spoken
A: so which of you is fighting for king cole?
Hat: oh, it's certainly not me.
Har: It's not me. Man's a monster.
Hat: I thought you were his colonel.
Har: pretty sure I'm a major.
Hat: Oh, well, I’m sure there's documentation somewhere...
Chorus
Raise your cups raise your cups
To this sordid affair
For today we drink tomorrow we fight.
Raise your cups raise your cups
Majors hatter and Hare
As we’re on the brink just not tonight
Verse 2
Our entrenchment entrenched til more orders emerge,
(while war’s borders diverge), here we stay.
So while we're on the bench bring more tea concierge,
(ooh some lapsing souchong) or Earl grey.
Spoken
A: forget the tea, you're fighting tomorrow?
Dormouse: well actually, I think you'll find, that if today's tomorrow is tomorrow, then surely tomorrow's tomorrow is today. Oh, no,wait a minute….
Chorus
Verse 3
They say keep your friends close and your enemies closer,
It's a tried and tested strategy that's work for us so far.
With war plans in pieces and peace talks disbarred
(both) we’re on the brink just not tonight!
*singing*
Spoken
Hat: oh she's leaving. Odd girl.
Har: probably an enemy spy.
Hat: almost definitely.
Har: hatter?
Hat: yes Hare?
Har: have you noticed there's a dormouse in the teapot?
Hat: I think it's always been there.

N: Alice had had just about enough of this nonsense, and left the majors or colonels or whatever they were behind as she headed north. The general had said that’s where the Crown forces were to be found, and it seemed they were the last hope Alice had of talking to someone sensible. But after three days of travel through burned out cities and fields of barbed wire, she was just about at the end of her tether. But just as she was about to collapse in complete despair, she saw something on the horizon. Alice couldn’t believe her eyes. Even sixty years later, everyone knew what a Rose Red looked like, but as they got close, she realised they weren’t really Rose Reds, but just their skin, stretched over shuddering robot bodies. Behind them, they dragged a platform, upon which stood a real Rose Red, perhaps the last on the planet. Her uniform was stained black with old blood, and she dragged behind her a human, dressed as a Lieutenant. He didn’t look very happy.
Round
We will find them
We bind them
We will chop of their heads heads heads.
We'll replace them with the face of lots of lovely rose reds reds reds
Intro
Queen of hearts presiding! I call to the stand, the prosecution: The Queen of hearts!
Song
As I was a-marching
My troops to the fray
The Craven knave of hearts
Came retreating my way
He was quickly followed after
And brought back with speed
He was handcuffed and guarded
And brought before me
Court Marshall, court Marshal
Then swiftly was declared
And the sentence passed upon him off with head
My queen have mercy on him
In your sad cruelty
I know the queen’s duty
Lies heavy upon thee
My queen the war is over
Since decades long gone
No! Until my last bullet
My troops will be string
Then set him free from his irons
And let him go free
For He’ll make a good soldier
For his queen and country

N: What happened to Alice after that, no one really knows. Some say she was rescued, others that she lost her own head, and some say she’s on that strange planet to this day. All we know for sure, is if you’re ever in that sector of space, you can turn your receiver to pick up a very odd message indeed.
A/CC: Come in all friendly military forces, this is Scout Captain Alice Liddel, requesting reinforcements! Lots of reinforcements! There’s a lot of fighting down here, so you need to send more soldiers! Send lots more soldiers. I need them. I need them for the war.

credits

from Tales To Be Told, Volume II, released January 28, 2018

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The Mechanisms Oxford, UK

The Mechanisms: a band of immortal space pirates roaming the universe in the starship Aurora. Some say they’re from a steampunk future, others claim they’re from a cyberpunk past, a few even whisper that they may be from a dieselpunk alternate now. They are all correct. ... more

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